I write this from Far North Queensland. Weipa, on the western side of Cape York Peninsula, to be exact. I’ve been up here since Sunday. The boys are home alone.
I’m here setting up my Phd research project. Speaking with Traditional Owners, seeking their permission to do research, trying to suss out what may and may not work and what might be beneficial to the community. It’s all pretty confusing for me. I want to work with the community here to design my research. But that takes a lot of getting to know people first. Building relationships. So much background that I am oblivious to. Both on the ground and in the literature.
I’ll get there. Maybe.
Oh, and this 😦
But the point of this post is that none of it would be possible without significant support from J.
What a guy! Playing single parent, exhausted, overwhelmed, but still encouraging and reassuring me.
It’s been really hard for everyone. I don’t really feel okay being away for this long although i really want to do this work. It will be 10 days altogether. Lil I was really sad the first night and the following day. Crying, and asking me to come home now and J has had to pick up the pieces, all of them, the whole time, as well as cook dinner, clean, deal with night wakings etc.
He sent me this email on the first:
Long long night, day going fine. He got upset when Luke called and he talked to Luke – said he’d lost his mum (yep, there it is). Luke did his best to reassure him.
… We’ll be okay my love – it won’t be easy but it is fine….
Will ring in a bit – I’m just scared to cos I don’t want to set him off again, need a few hours of no crying first to recharge my batteries!
and this conversation on the second:
Hey, Dada, what about ice cream?
No love, not now, we’ve just eaten a big lunch
No Dada, I don’t want to eat it, I just want to talk about it (folds arms thoughtfully)
Oh, okay, well, how about that ice cream?
Well, I like to drink it when it’s a drink. In the bowl.
When it’s melted?
Yep! (looks pleased with himself)
What else do you know about ice cream?
There’s lots of colours like red and white and green
Mmmm, yum, I wonder what flavour greem is?
It’s what? Melon?
Why is it Ela flavoured?
Because it’s green
Then it was this one on the third:
IN bed, ASleep, TEN to seven, NO tears or moanin’….! Man a bad man!
Some days have been worse then others for both me and them. We miss each other. But I know that they are working it out together and growing stronger and closer because of it.
Makes me feel very blessed and supported.
Thank you my love.